Funny drunk hookup stories. Humorous short stories and funny jokes

Funny drunk hookup stories Rating: 8,2/10 1985 reviews

17 People Share Their Most Brutally Cringeworthy Hook

funny drunk hookup stories

Some guy in cowboy boots is walking by, slips in my puke, and takes a tumble. I did the same thing except I peed. At the end of the show we spoke to him about going to a bar or coming over, my birthday present to my friend…. The next morning he convinced his gf who was also way sloshed the night before that she did it an afaik she still believes she shit the bed that night. I've got more where that came from. I have worse stories that involve disgusting 'initiations' XilePrincess Do you live in Kabul by any chance? To this day I don't really know how, but I didn't end up getting thrown out, the cowboy didn't pummel me, and the chick just freaked out and left. He was charged with two counts of armed robbery and will appear in Perth Magistrates Court soon.

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Humorous short stories and funny jokes

funny drunk hookup stories

I have a wonderful life, and I'm excited to share it with you. Showed up at the bowling alley drunk as a skunk. Well, one day I went to a party and ended up sitting next to this really cute guy all night. One day I walk past his room and I see my friend with an electric shaver shaving over his laptop keyboard. It was then it hit that I had gripped the cash she had in her back pocket and put it into my own. Seriously, 12 hours this guy kept crying for the other guy to take him back.

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Embarrassing, Cringe

funny drunk hookup stories

I was super drunk so I think I was actually managing to have a decent conversation with him. We were driving with the windows cracked and smoking cigarettes. Thinking quickly, I formed a plan in my drunken and panicked mind. I vaguely remember the sex, but from what I remember I enjoyed it. His wife said, 'Don't you remember about three months ago when we broke down and those two guys helped us? After I refused he put on Bob Marley as we fell asleep. When I'm drunk I do really some really dumb shit that is actually pretty funny once I realize what happened. My phone had died in the night so I plug it in.

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Drunken Hookup Failures

funny drunk hookup stories

Right as we start to hookup and really get into it she starts screaming, like screaming screaming. I quickly grabbed him to head into the shower with me without any explination because I had no idea what to do. Check out the for more stories just like this! We rode the subway back late at night and a bum started begging us for money. As im walkin out the door, I turn to him and his girl who are now sittin on the bed and say that the cabs would be here shortly and Ill holla when they get here. Graduate of Suffolk University with a degree in Sociology.

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Dear Reddit, what's your best drunk story? : AskReddit

funny drunk hookup stories

Not a dorm story but an intoxicated naked guy broke into my college apartment. I went over his house and slept over. I quickly think about whether I could take her home, but remember that less than a week ago she had my puke all over her and decide I probably couldn't go through with it. A robber wielding an ornamental sword returned to the service station he had apparently just held up when he realised he had left his swag behind, police told News. We got up to the subway exit only to find a cop standing in our way did I mention we had been jumping the stalls all night in order to avoid paying for subway tickets, and that you needed a ticket to exit the subway? Later I found out I was on the fourth floor, and not the fifth where Dylan's room was. The door was cracked so I just pushed it open, and there was his dad. So, they came up tapped on the winder and told us 'we couldn't do that here.

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Humorous short stories and funny jokes

funny drunk hookup stories

The attendant took money from the till and packets of cigarettes and placed them in a bag. So that was one of the weirdest times I tried to hook up, I guess. On your left hand side there is a valley and on your right hand side there is a fire engine travelling at the same speed as you. As we're approaching the car, I hear it. Mayhem insues she begins gagging and shit, he's tryin to apologize and clean her face with his shirt, he's pukes again but now just straight onto his floor while standing and in mid sentence still tryin to apologize.

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13 Hilarious Halloween Sex Stories

funny drunk hookup stories

We talked and danced and were having a good time. I didn't realize that there was a button you had to press. My buddy passed out on the way home and she asked for his number. A few minutes later the roommate asked me if I had ever been to Paris. That's not funny at all, that's just mean :? Sophomore female We were both super drunk at a party so we went out to the front porch and started making out. He announces to us in the hallway that he needs it for the shower and goes and takes a shower.

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Funny Stories About Drunks

funny drunk hookup stories

Well there goes our security deposit! I am now married to the girl, and she still thinks she pissed the bed. The guy I was with luckily had his eyes closed and was pretty far gone too but I was so grossed out. Blamed it on hobos or frat boys. The worst part is I don't remember a thing about him and later my friends made sure I realized he was quite possibly the most unattractive guy in the entire bar and everyone saw us getting it on. He felt so bad that he sent her an apology text the next day.

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