Jeff, a 45-year-old ad agency owner, instantly hit it off with a female co-worker, who he was interested in pursuing after he moved on to a new job. He helped you move apartments last year, and made dinner with all your favorites that week your boss decided to rule with an iron fist. Don't assume that someone is going to judge you for that. I think this really depends on the person. You two have obvious chemistry—you flirt, you chat, you hang out—but the buck stops there.
The post has been deleted from Reddit, but here's the original thread via : This is kind of a weird one. It's embarrassing how much I like Ian. Once I was having a bad day and he surprised me by showing up my house and knocking on my window. In fact, some of your very best friends are probably members of the opposite sex. In a pretty intense Reddit post, user ProbablyGay1 shares with fellow Reddit users the story of his friendship and possible romance with his best friend, Ian. At first I noticed that he was uncomfortable when I'd touch him so I didn't.Next
I mean, the guy freaking named some sort of scientific finding after ProbablyGay1. We put that question posed by When Harry Met Sally to bed ages ago. Well, for starters, I think all signs here point to Ian feeling the same way. Since then, their friendship has really escalated to what's definitely a best friendship, and what's also quite possibly a very beautiful romance. But even in the off chance that Ian doesn't feel the same way, ProbablyGay1 deserves the chance to know that for a fact and move on. He's attractive and smart and funny and overall, probably my favorite person ever. How do I ask him whether we're boyfriends, or if he wants to be? You are most definitely sending mixed signals.Next
I hang out with my sister regularly and meet up with an old friend about every other week to drink and play billiards; but both don't exactly strike me as a circle of friends. I found out from his friends that he talks about me a lot, which is a relief because I talk about him to my friends all the time. He's not going to get that chance unless he works up the courage to ask Ian how he feels. Eventually I decided that it was time to stop being afraid of Ian and try to be friends with him. I've been reluctant to ask them out because I don't have a real social circle. If two people that are friends decide to date and it doesn't work out, it always makes things weird. I'm graduating college this year he's staying to get a higher degree and I realized it's the first time I can decide where to live, and I also realized that where I want to live is with him.
Over the past months a few girls have expressed interest in wanting to go out with me. How can you tell the difference between a and, well, just a romance? I woke up before him and just thought about how nice this was, and how lucky I was. When he came back he told me he identified a new type of thing I'm being vague, his major is weirdly specific. Its hard to make new friends as an adult and not all friendships from your younger years will last. In my mind, the person is obviously going to tell everyone. Ian and I attend different colleges, but we talk everyday.Next
But you should find a way to meet people. And there's entry of people out there that new that one good friend. Do you think it's worth it for ProbablyGay1 to bring it up and possibly risk his entire relationship with his best friend? What, straight bros don't snuggle? Well that made me sound like a hermit. Finally, what I find as possibly the most plausible evidence leaning toward the two of them being more than friends is that ProbablyGay1 is totally head-over-heels in love with Ian: I think about Ian a lot. Lately I've been wondering if Ian and I are more than just good friends at this point. To the women who think this is a turn-off: I understand the concern for the 'clingy' problem and so forth, but do you really judge a guy that harshly just because of circumstances that he can't really control? Ian has always been vague about his orientation.Next
The attraction he feels is more of a slow-burn instead of fireworks. Since this generation of singles is more emotionally-evolved than ever before, traditional dating norms have basically been tossed out the window, says psychologist Karla Ivankovich, Ph. I mean I can hold a conversation, take care of my health and appearance and have plenty of hobbies and interests. Now we're physical all the time-not sexually, but he'll lean against me if we're standing together, or put his arm around my shoulder. He can make my whole day by texting me.Next
My best friend and I have some not-so-platonic behavior. There's nothing wrong with that—especially since you might actually feel the same way. Now, that said, you might still have questions about how your single guys see you—particularly that friend in your circle with whom sparks always fly. You really only need one good friend. It sounds dumb, literally receiving rocks and leaves in the mail, but you bet your ass I have a whole shelf devoted to that shit.Next
Yeah he was quiet, but that was only because he was kind of introverted, and he doesn't like talking about himself. He wasn't anti-social, just not pro-social and that was fine. I ask because that's what happened to me in the past two years. I don't really care how ProbablyGay1 chooses to go about asking Ian about their relationship, but I sure hope that he does it. If you only see your guy friend sporadically, you might not be on his relationship radar just yet.Next
As you can see, there are a lot of things that can be explained as things that regular straight best friends do, and other things that. It's like I've built it up because we've been friends for so long. About a year after I really started hanging out with Ian, there was a revelatory moment where I realized that I was Ian's best friend. If she's also somewhat introverted, it probably wouldn't bother her, but if she's the kind of person who wants to be around a lot of friends when she goes out, then it could be a problem. Ian and I ended up seeing each other a lot. So knowing this how much value would you put on a guy based on the number of friends he has? I was kind of floored, and asked him why.Next